Jurassic Park is one of those movies that probably shouldn’t be remade. With groundbreaking special effects, an unforgettable cast, and that legendary John Williams score, Steven Spielberg’s 1993 blockbuster is about as close to perfect as Hollywood gets. But what if, instead of remaking the movie, someone made a premium television series that went back to Michael Crichton’s original novel? Spielberg tried to do dinosaurs on TV before with Terra Nova, but committing to the bit with a fresh adaptation of the Crichton novel would probably go over better with audiences. HBO’s Harry Potter series is revisiting the books with an entirely new cast and taking the time to fully explore the source material. Jurassic Park could get the same treatment without infringing on Universal’s ongoing Jurassic World franchise. Have a new Jurassic Park on TV, while Jurassic World is still going on the big screen.
Audiences already know Crichton’s ideas work on television. In addition to creating ER, HBO’s Westworld, based on another of the author’s stories about a high-tech theme park where everything goes horribly wrong, demonstrated just how much these concepts benefit from having room to breathe. So why not bring in Westworld co-creator and Fallout Executive Producer Jonathan Nolan to run the whole thing? He’s already got experience turning one of Crichton’s technological nightmares into prestige television. An eight-episode adaptation could bring back the darker tone, corporate intrigue, river chase, and the very different endings of several main characters from the book. With Nolan in charge of the show, all we’d need is a cast. We’d pick these seven actors for a new trip to Isla Nublar.
Richard Attenborough’s John Hammond was a lovable grandfather whose dream of letting humans interact with dinosaurs was ill conceived but well intentioned. The Hammond of Crichton’s book, however, is much less sympathetic. The character is an arrogant and manipulative businessman so convinced of Jurassic Park’s commercial potential that he completely refuses to acknowledge the obvious dangers. Even as his employees are being eaten around him.
Michael Sheen could give us the best of both worlds. His roles in The Queen, Frost/Nixon and Good Omens really demonstrate how easy it is for him to turn from charming, theatrical, and self-important to downright sinister. Imagine Sheen introducing his fabulous dinosaur theme park with all the enthusiasm of a kid showing off a brand new toy. And then the cracks start to show as the series progresses. The dinosaurs are the investments, the employees are expendable, and the park has to open. The novel also gives Hammond a particularly nasty ending involving a pack of Procompsognathus. Observing Sheen’s progressively frantic billionaire come to the realization that nature is indifferent to his monetary forecasts would serve as a very appropriate finale.
Ask anyone on the internet who should play Dennis Nedry, and a large percentage of respondents will probably say Paul Walter Hauser. And while we normally would go with public opinion, he played too similar of a character in Resident Evil. Instead, we have a different actor in mind for Wayne Knight’s disgruntled InGen employee. And he’s proven he can be pretty annoying too.
We are nominating Mark Proksch, best known as Colin Robinson, the energy vampire in What We Do in the Shadows. Not many actors can make a passively aggressive coworker hilarious, but Proksch could definitely bring a gloriously grating dimension to Nedry. Crichton’s Nedry is a talented programmer who believes John Hammond has taken advantage of him. Giving Proksch several episodes to develop that resentment could make his eventual betrayal more than just a clever plot device. Let’s be honest, though, we’d still be excited when he finally has his real-time lesson on dino safety.
Samuel L. Jackson’s Ray Arnold is one of Jurassic Park‘s most memorable supporting characters. His increasingly frustrated attempts to restore the park’s systems lead to one of the film’s most memorable offscreen deaths. But a television adaptation could give the character considerably more to do before everything falls apart.
Tyler James Williams, who starred on Everybody Hates Chris before taking on the role of Gregory Eddie on Abbott Elementary, is perfectly deadpan for a man surrounded by idiots. His responses to Principal Ava Coleman are becoming increasingly exasperated, almost as if he is auditioning for a role in which he has to deal with John Hammond and Dennis Nedry. Williams even dressed as Mr. DNA for a Halloween bit in Abbott Elementary. A costume that nobody at the school seemed to appreciate. His run on The Walking Dead shows he’s no stranger to scenarios where there’s a real possibility of being eaten alive. He could also add some hilariously dry sarcasm to the unfolding catastrophe while ensuring that Arnold remained the most capable individual in the control room. And the actor would have to say Samuel L. Jackson’s most memorable line from the movie. We think Mr. Eddie could give us a very original take on “Hold onto your butts.”
The late Sam Neill made Dr. Alan Grant cinema’s most beloved paleontologist. Thanks to Dark Matter, Joel Edgerton is now one of the world’s most beloved pretend physicists. The Australian actor has the rugged appearance and understated intensity of someone who could spend months digging in the Montana badlands for fossils. But he’s also the guy who would believably put two kids he doesn’t know ahead of himself. Crichton’s version of Grant isn’t nearly as uncomfortable around children as he is in Spielberg’s film. He actually likes them, particularly young Tim Murphy, who shares his enthusiasm for dinosaurs. Edgerton could easily bring that more engaged educator dynamic to the role.
This Dr. Grant would have to sit somewhere between Edgerton’s work in Apple TV’s Dark Matter and Netflix’s Train Dreams. In Dark Matter, he plays a physicist struggling with the terrifying consequences of scientific discovery. His performance as a hard-working logger in Train Dreams shows the sense of wonder he can emote as the world changes before his eyes. From there, it’s kind of easy to imagine how he could play a paleontologist confronted with his life’s work being brought back into existence through technology.
If there is an heir apparent for Laura Dern in Jurassic Park, it’s Mackenzie Davis. The Station Eleven actress has the poise, intelligence, and awkward charm that made Dern a household name. The future DCU actress has demonstrated she can bring humanity to her sci-fi work, exuding a quiet resolve in her characters that would bring a welcome grit to Ellie. Sure, she’s going to have to run for her life a lot, but we’d also like to see her kick some dino ass alongside our number one pick.
A faithful adaptation of the book could also give her character more to do. Her specialty in prehistoric botany becomes a bigger part of the story as she investigates dangerous plant life, though she’s still a necessary distraction for the raptors. While Ellie and Grant don’t have a relationship in the books, there’s no reason to deny one of the better additions the movie made to the experience, and we think Joel Edgerton’s Grant would look cute with Davis’ Ellie.
No one is going to out Goldblum Jeff Goldblum. His portrayal of Dr. Ian Malcolm is iconic. Perhaps instead we cast another actor who is known for bringing a disarming charm to eccentric characters as well, LaKeith Stanfield. As one of the few people who is outright appalled at the creation of modern dinosaurs, Malcolm is the audience’s counterweight to the awe of the creatures. The film Sorry to Bother You highlighted how the actor can navigate the pull between corporate absurdity and increasingly surreal situations. His performance as Darius in Atlanta also showed Stanfield’s knack for delivering surprisingly profound observations.
Stanfield’s Dr. Malcolm going toe-to-toe with Michael Sheen’s John Hammond is a matchup I would gladly upgrade my Peacock to premium to see. One is a billionaire convinced he can control nature, while the other is a chaos theorist that knows Hammond is playing with things beyond his capabilities. And Stanfield wouldn’t need to do an impression of Jeff Goldblum to make the character memorable. Stanfield’s looser screen presence and unpredictable mannerisms would make the character’s lengthy diatribes on chaos theory some of the most potentially entertaining scenes in the series.
Before anyone starts complaining about gender-swapping Robert Muldoon, just picture Gwendoline Christie hunting velociraptors with a rocket launcher. End of argument. At 6’3″ Christie possesses the physical presence to make Jurassic Park‘s fearsome game warden instantly believable. Her role as Brienne of Tarth in Game of Thrones showed that she can play a battle-hardened professional who commands respect without always having to prove how tough she is.
And unlike Bob Peck’s ill-fated game warden in Spielberg’s movie, Crichton’s Muldoon actually lives through the disaster. The novel gives him a much bigger part, including his attempts to hunt down the escaped raptors using some seriously heavy weaponry. Christie could make Roberta Muldoon one of the most interesting supporting characters in the series, a former big game hunter who loves these great animals but knows better than anyone why they shouldn’t be kept in captivity. And yes, she should totally say, “Clever girl.”
Of course, there is one cast member we wouldn’t dream of replacing. Don’t worry, Mr. DNA would have to return to reprise his role. Some things are sacred. We might have to do the unthinkable, though, and give the dinosaurs their feathers. Paleontology has come a long way since Spielberg’s original film, and a new adaptation could reflect what scientists have learned about how some of these animals actually looked. Sure, audiences might have trouble accepting a feathered Velociraptor, but we’ve spent more than 30 years pretending they were six feet tall. A little scientific accuracy probably wouldn’t hurt. And if the dinosaurs look ridiculous, at least Gwendoline Christie will be there with a rocket launcher.
Who would you want to see in a reboot of Jurassic Park? Let us know in the comments below.
